Church this morning was AWFUL! Jayen was so crazy and all over the place. Matt and I have noticed that quite often we get head shakes and stares because of Jayen's behavior. This has started to bother me more and more. I'm not sure how to approach these gestures of displeasure from others in a place that teaches not to judge. I thought this would be one of the most welcoming places we could be. We actually really love that there is a child with down syndrome that serves every Sunday. How welcoming everyone is to her and how welcoming we were hoping the would be towards Jayen. I sure don't feel welcome!
Today Jayen was extra extra crabby and crazy. I eventually had to take him out of church two separate times, when we came back in he was still being bad. I ended up holding him the rest of mass but was head butted in the eye, hit with a tractor, hit with his hands. I was exhausted after church; physically and emotionally. On the way home I broke down crying. I am a special education teacher. I have had training and experience working with children with special needs, but when it comes to my own child I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL I AM DOING! What can I do? How do I help him? How do I teach him? How do I get through the day/week/month/year? Feeling really down!
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