SPED teacher with no skills

Church this morning was AWFUL! Jayen was so crazy and all over the place. Matt and I have noticed that quite often we get head shakes and stares because of Jayen's behavior. This has started to bother me more and more. I'm not sure how to approach these gestures of displeasure from others in a place that teaches not to judge. I thought this would be one of the most welcoming places we could be. We actually really love that there is a child with down syndrome that serves every Sunday. How welcoming everyone is to her and how welcoming we were hoping the would be towards Jayen. I sure don't feel welcome!
Today Jayen was extra extra crabby and crazy. I eventually had to take him out of church two separate times, when we came back in he was still being bad. I ended up holding him the rest of mass but was head butted in the eye, hit with a tractor, hit with his hands. I was exhausted after church; physically and emotionally. On the way home I broke down crying. I am a special education teacher. I have had training and experience working with children with special needs, but when it comes to my own child I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL I AM DOING! What can I do? How do I help him? How do I teach him? How do I get through the day/week/month/year? Feeling really down!

Another seizure

It has been two weeks since our last seizure and I was starting to get a little hopeful that we had found the right dosing and medicines to control them again. I was wrong! This morning Jayen woke up and had another pretty big seizure. It would not stop. When we thought it was over we laid him in bed so his brain could sleep and recover, but I had noticed his hand grabbing at the sheets. His seizure lasted close to seven minutes. I don't know where to go from here. I'll call Minnesota on Monday. Is this ever going to end?

2012 Nebraska Epilepsy Walk

It was such a beautiful day for a walk. Matt and I decided very last minute that we were going to participate in the 2012 Nebraska Epilepsy Walk at Shadow Lake Town Center. We created a team called Jayen's Journey, raised a little money ($465 to be exact), and had a few friends join us. It was such an awesome feeling. Everyone was so welcoming and accepting of Jayen. No one was looking at us funny when he screamed at the top of his lungs or wouldn't listen when mommy told him to do something 500 times. They were curious who we were walking for and how he was doing. I felt like for once in his life he was the "normal" and I kind of felt like the outcast. I was so proud of him! I was so proud of my husband for helping me put our team together in such a short amount of time and the money he raised. I was proud of Dalan for being such a great big brother. I was proud of my family. I was PROUD of where we are in life!
Thanks everyone who supported us. Thanks Colorado Foxhovens, Michelle Carranza, James and Stacy Kreikemeier, Maria Bovastro, AGE shop, FTD instructors, Bob Foxhoven, Charles Foxhoven, Naomi Hutchinson, Josh and Caleb Joslin, Rikki, Jason and Grant Hayek, and Theresa Hochstein. You all made me so proud!

Dalan got a spiderman (face paint) tattoo

Charles thought he needed one too. Dalan promised him it wouldn't hurt.